I think the last two weeks have quite possibly been the craziest, most stressful....that I've had in a long time. Last week, we (my four kids and I) traveled to Gatlinburg, Tn for my family reunion with my six siblings their families and our mom. Every other year we choose another random spot to go. It is pretty much the only time we are all ever in one place. I love it... I love seeing my brothers and sisters that I don't see very often and my cute nieces and nephews that are growing up so fast. This year I didn't know if I was going to be there, especially with everything we are dealing with at home. My mom would ask me if I was going and all I could say was.... I don't know. She finally ended up just getting plane tickets and saying we'll see what happens. My stress began when I knew I was going to have to tell my husband I was going but he wasn't. He physically couldn't make the trip....and he would have been so exhausted by the time we got there. It just wouldn't have been worth it for him to go.....well we've gone and come home....and he's still upset about it. I've come to the conclusion that in my life whatever decision I make I'm always going to hurt someone. It would really be nice if one day it didn't have to be that way. Anyway.... the two weeks before we left I was filled with anxiety. As I get older I hate flying more and more....so my sleep was off, I was having awful dreams and I couldn't get myself excited about going. I had to figure out how I was getting my husband to the place he was supposed to stay.... because of course his family wouldn't help. I had to figure out what to do with the dog...and the fish. And I had to buy clothes that actually fit my children since I had a couple go through major growth spurts this year. It was a lot of running around and making sure I had everything I needed. (You have to understand....aside from these family reunions...since I've been married I haven't been on vacation in the last 14 years). Finally the week before, I got everything worked out....Todd ended up staying home, because he refused to go to the nursing home...and we had someone check on him daily. Everything else just fell into place.
The day before we left....my car died...well it decided to start over heating. My only car that works....what I was supposed to drive to the airport. I knew I could get a ride to the airport (and we did)....it was the fact that I was going to come home to a car I had to fix.....and I cried. Then the fun began. Now I don't know if you've ever had the joy of flying to or through Atlanta....but unless I'm visiting my sister in Georgia....I will never go there again. We arrived in Atlanta on time and had a 2 hour lay over before our flight to North Carolina...2 hours turned into 3...then 4 then 5...and then they canceled it altogether. I only had 5 days on this trip...I had already known that 2 of those days would be spent traveling....We couldn't get on a flight until the next morning. My 3 days of rest...recharging my batteries so to speak...was cut down to 2 1/2. I was stressed and upset, but I couldn't wait to see everyone so I pushed it all aside. We had a 2 hour drive through the Smoky mountains...it was nice. I like driving....I prefer driving. I was totally contemplating just driving home after the reunion to avoid flying altogether. When we finally got to our destination I felt like I could breath a little.
It was 2 1/2 days that were packed with things to do...and we had so much fun. I was glad that we went. I forced myself to be around everyone...because even though I was glad to be there....my emotions were always close to the surface. It was hard looking around and seeing my siblings with their spouses. I was alone.....and I felt very much alone....it could have been very depressing....but I kept busy. We wore ourselves out. It was a full and well spent 2 1/2 days. I wasn't gone long enough to relax....but it's ok. My last night there....I spent up all night with the stomach flu. One of those REALLY?!?!? moments. I honestly spent a lot of my vacation thinking that Karma was coming back on me. Between the car and the canceled flight and the stomach flu....good grief...I can never do anything and have it be easy. We got home safe and sound...and on time...and I managed not to puke on the flight home after the night I had had. Got up the next morning and checked on and weeded my gardens...all was good...and then I slipped down my stairs and sprained my foot.....again...REALLY?!?!? Well....I can't complain too much I got to stay in bed for 2 days and got some rest. And the pain isn't too bad anymore. The car is getting fixed...hopefully I'll have something to drive again tomorrow...and life goes on. All I can do is look back over the past couple of weeks and be thankful....it may have felt like a dream because it went by so fast...but I'm glad we went. I'm glad we had that time together...and I'm so very thankful to have the family that I do.
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